息子「お父さん、たまには会社の帰りにプールバーなんてどうですか？気分が変わりますよ。」
父親「余計なお世話だ。私には晩酌が一番いいんだ」
Yokei na Osewa
(Sarariiman no musuko to chichioya no kaiwa)
Musuko: Otoosan, tama ni wa kaisha no kaeri ni puuru ba nante doo desu ka? Kibun ga kawarimasu yo.
Chichioya: Yokei na osewa da. Watashi ni wa banshaku ga ichiban ii'n da.
(A conversation between a salaried worker and his son)
Son: Dad, how about stopping at a Pool Bar on your way home from work sometimes? You'll be a different person afterwards.
Father: Now that's all I need to hear! No, I'll stick to my evening drink, thank you.
The lifestyle of Japanese salaried workers is changing. Instead of late night socializing and drinking with co-workers, the trend in Tokyo is for people to consider after work time their own time and to go out and try to meet as many different people as possible in as healthy a way as possible. People are joining swimming clubs and taking up indoor tennis and raquet ball. And young salaried workers are enjoying pool while sipping wine and beer at "pool bars," the
trendiest place for meeting people with different backgrounds and interests. A shift is on from vertical relating to horizontal relating.
Inviting people over 40 to engage in such pastimes, however, has its limitations. Their lifestyle is just too different.
"Yokei na sewa nado shinai ho ga ii" ("It's better not to poke your nose into it"). Though yokei has various meanings, in this case it means "unnecessary" and, as in this week's conversation, is most often found in conversations between parents and children, husbands and wives, and good friends.
Yujin: Sonna ni amai mono bakari taberu to futoru wa yo.
Watasni: Yokei na osewa yo.
A friend: You're going to get fat if you eat only those sweet things.
Me: I don't need your advice.
Tsuma: Zuibun shutchoo ga ooi no ne. Dare ka ni kawatte morattara?
Otto: Yokei na osewa da.
Wife: You certainly have a lot of business trips. Why don't you have someone else go?
Husband: I think you ought to keep out of it.
Though the husband here is naturally tired from all his trips, like many Japanese men, he feels this issue is a company problem and that his wife's opinion is thus not important.
Haha: Shiken na noni benkyoo shinakute ii no?
Daigakusei no musume: Okaasama, yokei na osewa wa shinaide.
Mother: Is it all right not to study considering it's exam time?
Daughter in college: Mom, if I need advice, I'll ask you.
Such words would anger any Japanese mother given that most feel they still have the right to watch over their daughters even after they enter college....
"Yokei na osewa to wa nan desu ka?" ("Whatdo you mean, if you need advice, you'll ask me!").
As I write this column my daughter is sitting near by - talking a lot. "Nee, onegai, Urusai kara yokei na osewa shinai de" ("Come on. Be quiet. I don't need any uninvited advice."). It seems the kinder we are the more we want to give yokei na osewa. Countries even choose to meddle (yokei na osewa) in one another's domestic affairs.