木村：「加藤さんが会社をやめるそうですね。やめる理由をごぞんじですか」
佐々木：「いいえ。彼はなかなか本音を言わないので、見当もつきません」
Honne
Kimura: Kato san ga kaisha wo yameru soo desu ne. Yameru riyuu wo gozonji desu ka?
Sasaki: lie. Kare wa nakanaka honne wo iwanai node, kentoo mo tsukimasen.
Kimura: I hear Kato is going to leave the company. You don't happen to know why, do you?
Sasaki: No, I have noidea. He just doesn't open up about things like that.
* * *
Honne refers to allowing one's conscience to dictate one's speech; it's often used with the verb haku as well as the iu of this week's conversation.
Since telling people directly what one thinks is not considered good manners in Japan, asking someone to reveal their "real" feelings-during a discussion, for instance-is difficult (honne wo kiku no wa muzukashii). And when there's possibility that revealing one's honne will bring disgrace upon someone else (honne wo itte aite wo kizu tsukeru), most people are especially careful to avoid "speaking from the heart" (keshite honne wo id to shinai.)
During the Kamakura Period a monk named Yoshida Kenko wrote an essay titled "Random Thoughts From My Leisure Hours" ( Tsurezuregusa).
In it he expresses his "real" feelings (kare no honne wo kaiteiru) about life ("Mono iwanu wa hara fukururu waza nari" i.e., "Failure to speak one's mind will result in a buildup of stress"), music, travel, nature, love, women, and friendship. When first exposed to Kenko in high school Japanese language classes, I didn't find his thoughts on life very interesting. But considering he wrote in the midst of Japan's feudal culture, these honne de kakareta zuihitsu (essays which express his honest opinions) and penetrating observations are really remarkable.
Some Japanese easily express their "real" feelings (honne wo iu hito) ; others generally avoid doing so (anmari honne wo iwanai hito.) In our increasingly global society, however, more and more will need to speak frankly if they expect to be understood by others.
One often hears the expression honne to tatemae. Felt to be the opposite of honne, tatemae refers to opinions expressed for all to see, openly and publicly.
Some people, of course, express publicly ideas or thoughts they don't actually believe (i.e., tatemae de hanasu). They think that doing this will make them more acceptable. If, as a rule, human beings are sensitive to what other people think about them, the Japanese should be considered especially sensitive. Japanese are just extremely reluctant to express criticism in front of other people. This is even true of people who review books and music-instead of "reviewing," they merely tell us what the work is about and why it's good. A reviewer Iriend of mine explains why she's reserved in her comments,"Honne wo kaitara ano hito wa okoru deshoo kara ne" ("It's because if I really tell the truth, the author will get angry.") I guess honne wo haku (showing one's true colors; letting one's hair down; getting the truth out, etc.) is a tricky business here in Japan.